Surrogacy and Feminism

Surrogacy in Sweden is not regulated. It still exists, but there are no guidelines and there no control. Most women’s organisations are against legalising it, but Sweden is starting to consider to do just that. The Swedish Association for Sexuality Education (RFSU) has said that they support surrogacy and that every person should have the right to decide what to do with their body. The Swedish Feminist Initiative party has criticised them because they believe that surrogacy is exploitation of a women’s body.

How does a feminist face the question of surrogacy? In my view, women should decide what to do with her body. A friend of mine has told me she wants to be a surrogate one day; she just had a baby of her own and that just solidified her wish. At the moment, without regulation, while being a surrogate, she has no rights. It is all based on discussion and agreements, but she has no fundamental rights, and neither do the future parents. If she decides to keep the baby, she can, and if the parents decide that they don’t want the child, she’s stuck with it.

I am surprised that a Feminist party would be against surrogacy. Shouldn’t a feminist make sure that there are regulations in a practice that exists? Shouldn’t a feminist make sure there are good conditions to do abortion or even to be a sex worker? Ignoring that something exists does not make it go away. Their main argument is that it leads to exploitation and abuse of a woman’s body, as well as opening a door for a black market. But if there are no regulations, there is only a black market and risks.

I find it frustrating when women tell women what to do or not do with their body, as well as telling them that some of their choices are wrong. It is okay, acceptable and even reinforced that women should take birth control pills, which makes your body thinks it’s pregnant for 40 years (is that even healthy?), but if they have many sex partners, they have a problem. Worse even is if a woman chooses to work in the sex industry – and yes, some women find it empowering.

There are situations where the woman has no choice, and ends up in the sex industry to sustain herself and her family. But what is the root problem here: that sex is money or that women end up not having a choice? Sex will always sell – for women AND men, it is human nature. Regulating prostitution, having labour rights, paying taxes, as well as regulating surrogacy, makes situations SAFER for these women. Just like drugs – criminalising it doesn’t make it go away. We have a problem with drugs, a lot of people die, but if we control it, less people will die and less people end up in jail (which in turn will force them back in the drug industry).

Sex, Gender, Intersex: how biologists are showing that sex and gender is a wider spectrum.

Determining someone’s sex is even more complicated according to a recent article in Nature: Sex redefined – The idea of two sexes is simplistic. Biologists now think there is a wider spectrum than that. We have learned to believe that XX is woman and XY is man, if you have a penis you are a man and if you have a vagina you are female. Yet, it has become much deeper than that and this will shutter everything you have learned.

Through embryo development, certain genes actively determine your sexual organs, and with overrepresentation or under-expression of these genes, it can lead to atypical sexual organs, such as XY individuals having an uterus and Fallopian tubes, or XX individuals developing gonads with areas of both ovarian and testicular development. Sex determination is therefore a more complex process that we have learned to believe. There are in fact people that have external female genitalia but have a Y chromosome and internal testes. Moreover, researcher have uncovered more than 25 different and highly variable genes responsible for differences of sex development, which have mild effects on the individuals, some visible, some not. It leads to the understanding that vagina vs penis, or uterus vs testes, XX or XY, is not the best way to determine the person’s sex. People born with differences of sex development are identified as Intesex within the LGBTQ community.

There is large sex spectrum due to genetic variation and/or change events in development, in which people do not fit into the category of “typical woman” and “typical male”. It gets more complicated when you look at chromosomes at a cellular level, in which cells do not have the same sex chromosomes within the same individual. Different combinations will lead to different phenotypic attributes. There are individuals with cells with the sex chromosomes XX and X, or XY and X, or XX and XXY. These individuals develop some visible or not visible phenotypes. It is hard to look at someone and say: “Ah yes, you have a mosaic cells of XX and XXY”. Sex chromosomes seems also to behave differently, thus leading to the understanding that there is more biological sex differences, such as tolerance to stress and metabolism depending on the genes present in the Y  and X chromosome.

Scientists are now aware that binary gender and sex might not be as true as society has taught us to believe. Moreover, those babies born with differences of sex development are usually corrected through surgery to meet the “normal” sex expression. Intersex individuals advocate that doctors and parents have to wait until the child can decide what gender identity they have, before they make the mistake to assign the wrong genitalia to the child.

So how do you determine the person’s gender? Is it through genitalia, chromosomes, cells or hormones? All of which exist in a spectrum from “typical male” and “typical female”. This shows the need for a third gender, other than “male” and “female”. And what is gender? How does a three year old child know if zie’s male or female? And for those that rub their heads and say “I have no idea what I am”, why can’t they just be agender? What about those that have alternating gender identities – sometimes they wake up as male and other times as female. How does that work? As the writer of the article, Claire Ainsworth put it so eloquently:

“In other words, if you want to know whether someone is male or female, it may be best just to ask.”

A question to you readers: what gender do you identify yourself with and why? All answers are acceptable.

Same-sex Couples in Ads.

After a conversation with fellow blogger dopechic who commented on my post Zalando and their Sexist Ads, I felt compelled to research a little further on ads featuring same-sex couples. The ads that I found, are so simple, and they are so well done. It is as it should be – just a normal family, not a big deal, whatever.

Get your popcorn ready! Here are a few ads featuring same-sex couples!

Here is a Swedish ad for ICA, Swedish retailer. Their ads are based on 5 characters that work in the store, and the characters and story was created in 2001. They are quite good, and the recent years, one of the characters has down syndrome. Either way, the following ad is in Swedish, but basically this one guys comes out as …. a vegetarian. “My father wasn’t very happy that I am a vegetarian”. The other’s react with “you do whatever you want in your private time”, “don’t be mean, I have many vegetarian friends”. An excellent way to show that these comments sound so ridiculous if you change “gay” to “vegetarian” or “brunette”, because they are!

Interesting though, is that I do not find lesbian couples in ads. It is a bit upsetting. I always felt that, thanks to porn, lesbian couples are very sexualised. You often hear “may I join” from idiots. Is that why they are not often in ads? Either way I will keep looking.

Here is one more as a treat. Get some tissues.

Do you know any other awesome ads? Maybe some featuring lesbian couples? Leave it in the comment bellow!

How Non-Sexist Ads Look Like

I found the best post on non-sexist ads! Check it out!

“Do you still think I’m pretty?” Some non-sexist themes for that Windows Surface commercial

It is easy to sit here and say…

      Don’t do like this.

      That is sexist.

      That’s the worst way you could make the ad.

      Sexist.

You need to come up with constructive comments, and give examples of what is a good ad. Looking for gender equality ads for women and men is actually a nightmare. Until I stumbled upon the website that I liked above. It gives some great examples of non-sexist ads. Here is one:

Soon all ads will incorporate more variable characters and story lines in their ads. People say “sex sells”. I disagree. By feeding this notion that sex sells, you are permitting people to be sexist. The only difference men and women have is their genitals, and nothing else. The rest is all made from year and years of being chapped into whatever you have become.

Characteristics such as work ethic, integrity, and intellect will always have a place in advertising. There are many qualities that an advertisement could use to make a competitor look bad, but you should keep brainstorming if all you have to jab them with is their gender. – Michelle Godfrey

Children are becoming sexual at a younger age. While at 10 I used to play hide and seek, today 10 year olds are wearing mini skirts and a ton of makeup. The fact that internet and TV is more accessible, as adults we have the responsibility in creating ads that are LESS sexualised. Actually, sell the product for what is is. If you have to sell your product with sex, it is then a crappy product.

Sex doesn’t sell, it just makes you, your product and your company look like shit.